Aged Care: Planning Ahead for the People Who Matter
Part 2: Where Do You Start When Mum or Dad Needs More Help?
One of the questions that often comes up when families begin considering aged care is surprisingly straightforward: Where do we actually start?
It sounds like a simple question, but the answer can feel anything but simple when you're dealing with an ageing parent who may need more assistance than they have in the past.
You might know that Mum is finding it harder to manage the house, or that Dad has become increasingly reliant on family members for everyday tasks. Perhaps you've already had a conversation about getting some help, but you're not sure whether that means arranging occasional assistance at home, organising an assessment or beginning to investigate residential aged care.
For many families, the difficulty isn't necessarily recognising that additional support may be needed. It's understanding how the aged care system works, what services are available and which decisions need to be made first.
In Part 1 of this series, Aged Care: Beat the New Year Rush, I discussed why it's worth having these conversations before circumstances become urgent. This week, I want to look at what happens next, because taking the first practical steps can be considerably less daunting when you understand the process.
Start with the person, not the system
Before getting caught up in applications, assessments and financial arrangements, I think it's worth spending some time understanding what your parent actually needs and, just as importantly, what they want.
A family may be concerned that Mum is struggling to maintain her home, while Mum herself may feel perfectly capable of managing her personal care and daily routines. Dad might need assistance with shopping and transport but have no intention of leaving the house he has lived in for decades.
Those differences matter because the appropriate response should be guided by the person's circumstances rather than an assumption that ageing inevitably leads to residential care.
I would encourage families to begin by identifying the particular activities that are becoming difficult. Is the concern mainly about housework, preparing meals or getting to appointments? Are there problems with mobility, personal care or managing medications? Has there been a noticeable change in memory or confidence that warrants medical attention?
A conversation with the person's GP can be a useful early step, particularly where health, memory or safety concerns have emerged. A medical review may help identify whether changes are related to a treatable condition, an ongoing health issue or a broader need for support.
The objective at this stage is not to decide where someone should live for the rest of their life. It's to develop a clearer understanding of what would help them remain safe, comfortable and as independent as possible.
I think this is an important distinction, particularly for older people who may resist the idea of aged care because they associate it with losing control over their lives.
Often, accepting some practical assistance is precisely what allows someone to maintain their independence for longer.
Understanding My Aged Care
For most families exploring government-funded aged care services in Australia, My Aged Care is the appropriate starting point.
It provides information about available services, eligibility and the assessment process. Families can begin through the My Aged Care website or by calling 1800 200 422.
The process generally begins with establishing the older person's circumstances and the type of assistance they may require. Depending on their needs, they may then be referred for an assessment to determine what services or care arrangements could be appropriate.
An assessment is not simply a formality. It is an opportunity to consider the person's health, daily activities, living arrangements, existing support and preferences.
For some people, the outcome may be approval for relatively straightforward assistance at home. For others, more comprehensive services or residential care may be considered.
One point I would emphasise is that being assessed does not automatically mean someone must accept every service offered or immediately move into residential care. The purpose is to establish eligibility and understand the available options.
Families should also recognise that approval for a service and actually receiving that service are not always the same thing. Availability, waiting periods and local provider capacity can affect when support begins.
That is another reason I encourage people to start gathering information before the situation becomes urgent.
What if Mum or Dad wants to stay at home?
For many older Australians, remaining in their own home is understandably the preferred option.
A familiar neighbourhood, established routines, friendships and a lifetime of memories can be enormously important to someone's wellbeing. Moving away from that environment may be particularly difficult when a person has recently lost a spouse or is already adjusting to changes in their health.
Fortunately, there are different forms of support that may help people continue living at home.
The Commonwealth Home Support Programme provides entry-level assistance for eligible older Australians who need help with everyday activities. This can include services such as domestic assistance, meals, transport and other practical support.
For people with more complex or ongoing care needs, the Support at Home program, introduced in November 2025, provides a broader range of services according to assessed needs and eligibility.
These arrangements may include assistance with personal care, nursing, allied health, domestic tasks and other services intended to support independent living.
The financial contributions required can differ depending on the services received and the person's circumstances. Some services may involve contributions, while other types of clinical care are treated differently under the program.
I would caution families against assuming that government-funded home support necessarily means all services will be free, or that an approved level of funding will cover every service they would ideally like.
Understanding what is available, what the person is eligible to receive and whether additional private services may be needed is an important part of planning.
There may also be situations where respite care provides valuable temporary assistance, particularly when a spouse or adult child has been carrying significant caring responsibilities.
The important point is that residential care is not the only pathway, and families should understand the alternatives before deciding that a permanent move is necessary.
When residential aged care becomes a consideration
There are circumstances where remaining at home may no longer be practical or safe, even with additional assistance.
A person's care needs may increase to the point where they require regular supervision, help throughout the day or access to nursing and personal care that cannot reasonably be provided in their existing home.
For families, recognising that point can be emotionally difficult. Adult children may feel that they are letting their parents down, while the older person may be frightened by the prospect of losing familiar surroundings.
I think it helps to remember that considering residential aged care is not necessarily a failure of family support. In some situations, it may provide the level of assistance, supervision and social interaction that a person needs.
The challenge is finding an arrangement that is appropriate for the individual.
When investigating facilities, I would encourage families to look beyond the appearance of the building or the location alone. Consider the care services available, staffing arrangements, daily routines, visiting opportunities, accessibility and how well the environment suits the person's preferences and needs.
It is also worth asking what happens if care requirements change. A facility that appears suitable today should ideally be able to explain how it responds when a resident needs more assistance.
Availability can vary, so families may need to investigate several options rather than assuming their preferred facility will have a place available at the time it is needed.
And while choosing the right care environment should be the primary consideration, understanding the financial arrangements is also essential before making a commitment.
Why the financial questions should begin early
This is where my role as a financial adviser often becomes particularly relevant.
Once families begin exploring residential aged care, they can find themselves dealing with unfamiliar terminology, different payment arrangements and financial decisions that may have consequences well beyond the immediate cost of care.
There are several questions I would encourage families to consider before making major commitments.
How much income does Mum or Dad have available to meet ongoing expenses? What assets do they own, and how might those assets be assessed? Would accommodation be funded through a refundable accommodation deposit, daily payments or a combination of both? What happens to their Age Pension, and how might their circumstances affect the contributions they are required to make?
The family home is often one of the most significant considerations.
For some people, selling the property may appear to be the simplest way to fund accommodation. For others, retaining it may be worth exploring, particularly where a spouse or another protected person continues living there, or where different income and asset arrangements need to be considered.
However, neither approach should be assumed to be financially preferable without understanding the individual's circumstances.
The treatment of the home for aged care purposes can differ from its treatment under Centrelink rules, and changes in ownership or rental arrangements may have consequences for fees, income and pension entitlements.
There have also been significant changes to aged care funding arrangements since November 2025, including revised residential care contributions and accommodation payment rules for many new residents.
These changes make it particularly important to establish which arrangements apply to the individual rather than relying on advice received by a friend or family member several years earlier.
I often think that the biggest risk in these situations is not necessarily making an obviously poor financial decision. It is making a seemingly sensible decision without understanding the alternatives.
A family might sell a property because they believe they have no other choice, or commit to a particular accommodation payment arrangement without fully considering its effect on future cash flow.
Once those decisions have been made, changing course may be difficult or expensive.
Appropriate financial advice can help families compare the available options and understand how different arrangements may affect the older person's longer-term financial position.
Who should be involved in the decisions?
Another practical consideration is establishing who will help manage the process.
In some families, one adult child naturally takes responsibility for organising appointments, contacting providers and gathering financial information. In others, several siblings may be involved, sometimes with different views about what should happen.
I think it is helpful to clarify responsibilities early, particularly where family members live in different cities or have competing work and caring commitments.
Most importantly, the older person should remain involved in decisions about their care and finances to the extent that they are able and legally entitled to do so.
Families should also understand whether appropriate legal arrangements are in place, including an enduring power of attorney for financial matters and relevant personal or health decision-making arrangements.
These documents serve different purposes and their operation depends on the laws of the relevant state or territory. Having an enduring power of attorney does not automatically give someone authority to make every medical or personal decision.
Where arrangements are missing or unclear, obtaining legal advice can help establish who has authority to act and what needs to be organised.
It is also worth gathering essential financial information before it is urgently needed, including details of bank accounts, superannuation or pension income, property ownership, insurance and existing legal documents.
That doesn't mean adult children need unrestricted access to their parents' finances. It means making sure that, with appropriate permission and authority, important information can be located when decisions need to be made.
A practical place to begin
If your family is starting to think about aged care, I would suggest concentrating on a manageable sequence rather than trying to resolve everything at once.
Begin with a conversation about the support your parent may need and what they would prefer. Where there are concerns about health, mobility, memory or safety, arrange an appropriate medical review.
The next step is to contact My Aged Care to understand the assessment process and the government-funded services that may be available.
Once you have a clearer picture of the likely care requirements, you can begin exploring local providers, possible waiting periods and the practical arrangements involved.
At the same time, start identifying the financial information that may be relevant, particularly if residential care is a possibility. Understanding income, assets, the family home and potential accommodation costs early can prevent unnecessary pressure later.
And before making significant decisions about property, accommodation payments or financial arrangements, consider obtaining advice that takes account of the older person's individual circumstances.
These steps do not all need to happen in a single week, and there is no reason to assume that beginning the process means a permanent move is inevitable.
The benefit of taking them gradually is that the family becomes better informed while the older person has more opportunity to express their preferences.
Taking the first step is often the hardest part
What I have come to appreciate about aged care planning is that families rarely begin the process with all the answers.
They may be uncertain about the level of care required, uncomfortable discussing money or worried about upsetting a parent who has always valued their independence. Often, they are trying to make decisions while managing their own careers, children and financial responsibilities.
That uncertainty is understandable.
But I don't think families need to have a complete plan before they begin asking questions.
The first conversation may simply establish that Mum would appreciate some assistance around the house. An assessment may identify services that allow Dad to remain independent for longer. A discussion about residential care costs may reveal financial options that the family hadn't previously considered.
Each step can provide information that makes the next decision a little easier.
As we move closer to Christmas, I would encourage families who already have concerns about an ageing parent's wellbeing not to leave every question until the new year. There is still time to begin understanding the process, gathering information and having conversations without the pressure of an immediate crisis.
Aged care planning is ultimately about helping someone receive appropriate support while respecting their dignity, independence and financial wellbeing.
And although the decisions can be complex, the starting point doesn't have to be.
Sometimes, the most valuable thing a family can do is simply begin the conversation and find out what help is available.
If your family is starting to explore aged care arrangements and you would like to understand the financial implications, particularly around accommodation costs, the family home or retirement income, you're welcome to reach out to me directly on LinkedIn for a confidential conversation.
Next in our aged care series: Part 3, What Does Aged Care Really Cost?
General information only. This article does not take account of individual financial circumstances, objectives or needs. Eligibility, care availability, fees and financial outcomes depend on personal circumstances and the applicable aged care rules. Consider obtaining appropriate care, financial and legal advice before making significant decisions.